I know that this letter will never reach you. I just write it to remind myself of the out-of-comfort-zone moment in my life.
Have you ever heard of “Focusing illusion or Anchoring”? I believe you should know it considering that you have mentioned the cognitive topics before.
The focusing effect (or focusing illusion) is a cognitive bias that occurs when people place too much importance on one aspect of an event, causing an error in accurately predicting the utility of a future outcome.
Anchoring or focalism is a cognitive bias that describes the common human tendency to rely too heavily on the first piece of information offered (the “anchor”) when making decisions. During decision making, anchoring occurs when individuals use an initial piece of information to make subsequent judgments.
I’ve never known that such the effect could seriously impact the behavior of someone, whom usually rationally thinks and acts. It could alter one’s behavior in the way that they still couldn’t believe themselves.
For some reason, my anchor had been set during our conversations, and it eventually damaged our lively back-and-forth. I have asked myself whether I regret for what I have done or not. Yes and No are the answers. I would reply “Yes” because I still miss a bit of humor and geek in your messages. Yet, I would give simple “No” since it helped me to find out the root cause of my unusual behavior, so that I could fix it before anything went worse.
Disappointingly, our story didn’t end well and you will never know that your short appearance in my life stimulated me to go after my promises. The words that I have promised to myself 6 years ago; something that I hope to accomplish within 10 years time. Our briefly bizarre moment was like a wake-up call in my life; to get up and take the real actions instead of saying some dreamy vows.
Since the chance that we will meet each other again is hardly possible in the wide real world. I’d like to apologize for everything I unintentionally/intentionally offended you. Thanks for your messages that put the smiles on my face and the thoughts on my mind.
Wish you all the best,