I think that some of us, who are single, hope that one day we would meet our soul mate; the other half of ourselves. I used to think something like that. The idea that someone would come to my life and complete me. (Yep, the famous quote from Jerry Maguire ‘You complete me.’)
In the past, the word ‘other half’ seems to misguide me somehow. It made me to look for something that I don’t have in the other person. When I tried to search for talent, skills, habits or anything that I wished I had, it feel like I always expected that they would act/think/do or whatever in the ways I wanted. And yes, I was always tired in that relationship because it was exhausted when you expected something too much. Such relationship was so unhealthy and it certainly couldn’t last long.
I was back in the no-relationship zone but I was still looking for someone who would complete me. This notion made me to weirdly act in a certain situation, which I eventually realized something…
The idea that I can’t wish or hope for someone to just walk into my life and complete some of my dreams.
But I should earn that by myself. I should do things that I want instead of expecting them from someone.
Because they are my dreams and expectations. No one could do that better than me.
More important, I should wish to share them with that special person if I could succeed.
From that realization, I finally understand these statements in the holstee manifesto.
If you are looking for the love of your life, stop; they will be waiting for you when you start doing things you love.
Right now, I am still in the no-relationship zone; but I am content and understand what I want to do in my life. Admittedly, I still have a tiny hope that one day that single person would come into my life and share the things we love together. However, I think I will be able to enjoy my life if it might never happen. Because when you’ve started doing somethings you love, it’s your bliss. And if you could find someone to share your joy with you, it is a bonus to life.