My heartbreaking is coming soon

In earlier blog posts a few months ago, I’ve mentioned one guy that I was attracted to. However, I haven’t had that strong feeling towards him anymore because there is another guy entering to my life. I’ve never thought of this new guy in the romantic way before even though we have been working together in the same department for almost 4 years. He is a good looking man, and he has broken up with his girlfriend for a while. Still, I saw him as just another co-worker who happened to not close to me at all. I also heard that I’m not his type.


Nevertheless, I never believed that only one hour could change my attitude for him. It started from the time I accidentally found his Facebook via our mutual friends. I liked his set of cover photos so I complimented him when I met him at office. I’d like to see his works more so I decided to send request to be his Facebook friend. It was alright for me if he rejected my request. Anyway, he accepted my friend request and he also sent message to say hello to me which I didn’t think he would do that. And we ended up talking to each other for an hour. At first, I thought he would just drop a greeting message to me but we could find other topics to talk to.

After that one hour conversation, I felt something in my heart and I wanted to talk to him again. I therefore said hello to him via Facebook messanger and we had another an hour talk. I believed that I just saw him in a different light. I meant he is a good looking man whom everyone generally like. But I’m a kind of girl who tends to fall for someone possessing the same interest as me. And it seemed that he has potential to be someone like that.

And how have I known that my heartbreaking is coming soon? Because after that 1st time, he never was the first one who says hello to me via Facebook. I was the one who has done that. But we didn’t talk to each other that often as I had to force myself not to do so. Anyway, we had 3 hours conversation last night which I was the one who initiated the chat. But it turned out that we had other things in common and that’s why we could talk to each other that long via Facebook messenger, not telephone.


From talking, I could tell that he isn’t interested in me in the romantic way but he might have wanted to find a friend who has common interests. Actually, I told myself not talking to him via Facebook again but I couldn’t stop myself because I enjoyed spending time chatting with him. It’s not that easy to find someone who is interested in the same thing. I used to encounter this kind of experience. I met a friend who liked the same thing as me. He chose another cute girl to be his girlfriend even though we could feel the connection. The experience left me an important message that boys mostly look for cute/beautiful girls as their girlfriend but girls like me will be only his friend.

The pain from that time still lingered in my heart quite long, and I didn’t want to face it again. However, I will be careful for this time. Trying to take care of my heart. It will be breaking but I know that it can be mended as well. It hurts but it will be healed.


2 thoughts on “My heartbreaking is coming soon

  1. You sound like a very wise person, Cotton. Just take each conversation as they come along, and have a good time chatting about what the two of you have in common :) Guys can be very funny and it’s hard to tell why they talk to you sometimes – like, are they talking to you because they like you in the romantic sense? Or because you look cute? Or you are intelligent?

    I heard some people say it’s better to have your heart broken over and over again than not being in love, because love is beautiful while it lasts. I really don’t know about this.

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