Anyone who came across this blog might have read about my crush on a guy at office. He used to have a girl friend before. His closed friend told me the reason they broke up. It was because his ex-girlfriend had a new guy while she was with him. They then broke up. However, she eventually stopped her relationship with another guy and went back to talk to be a friend with the guy I liked. And I just heard that they might be back to be an item. I don’t know the rumour will be true or not. I know only that I almost get over him. Right now, my special feeling for him has dropped to 10-20%. I believe that I will be better in time.
– Picture Credit –
My friends told me that I shouldn’t have talked to this guy whom I have had special feeling for via Facebook massager only. They said that I should have had conversation with him face to face as well. They explained to me that a person behind the screen might not be his total personality. That was why I tried to stop chatting with him in that way.
On the past Friday’s night, I got a chance to join his ride to co-workers’ party. We sat alone in his car, and faced heavy traffic jams so we’ve spent 2 hours talking. I found his flaws which they didn’t make me lessen or encourage my crush on him. It was the fact that my eyes has opened and looked at him as a normal human being, not a perfect guy behind the keyboard. It was a refreshing feeling and made me realize that I had created a picture perfect instead of seeing him as a normal guy who can possess good and bad sides.
When was the last time you were completely stumped by a question, a request, or a situation you found yourself in? How did you handle it?
– DailyPost –
Maybe a few weeks ago when I was asked about that guy I had one-side feeling for. My friend directly asked me whether I had special feeling for him or not. I was just stunned and said nothing. I knew I handle it badly. However, it was my weakness that I couldn’t lie when someone really asks me. Anyway, I had another friend near me that time and she helped my by directing our conversation to another subject. I was therefore able to avoid more difficult questions.
I know that I will not have anything to write about once in a while when I’ve promised myself to publish a post every day. And today is one of those days. Usually, I will write the update of my life on Sunday night. And recently, I’ve talked about my sad one-sided love. I believe that I’m getting better from the situation. Nothing much to say. I just need times to heal my broken heart. And need strength to act normally near him.
Say something, I’m giving up on you I’m sorry that I couldn’t get to you Anywhere, I would’ve followed you Say something, I’m giving up on you
But you know Hajime, some feelings cause us pain because they remain.
– South of the Border, West of the Sun: Haruki Murakami –
This quote really suits me well for my one-side love situation. It’s not that easy for me to stop my feeling for him even though I’ve came to the conclusion that he will never replicate my feeling.
The heart is such a complex organ. The more we try to get rid of that feeling, the more it remains. Hopefully, it will go away as soon as possible.
photo credit: Alfonsina Blyde » via photopin cc
A short film by Jason Rayner
My current love life is like this song…
I’d never ask you cause deep down
I’m certain I know what you’d say
You’d say I’m sorry believe me
I love you but not in that way