We are not allowed to stand still here

You might not know Nelson S. Howe but some people here in Thailand know him from the book by Benz Thanachart; author of a book called ‘New York 1st time’.  We called Mr.Nelson as ‘Uncle Nelson’. He has a unique character and sometimes he can express our thought better than Thai citizens. Some of us cannot speak our mind since Thai Junta has ruled our country for almost 3 years now. How ridiculous is that when you’ve come to think about this circumstance.

Uncle Nelson recently posted this picture and captioned it with

I have to practice this before going to Thailand because they don’t allow people to stand in public there


Photo Credit

Yes, he has spoken for some of us who can’t even say a word. His post just reacted to the news regarding protesting against abducting 8 Thai citizens by a group of militants (and now they are called “Facebook 8“)

Resistant Citizen, one of the few organizations that has campaigned against the military regime, announced the protest on Facebook Wednesday afternoon, urging the public to gather en masse at 6pm at the Victory Monument.

“We will stand there [silently] because we do not agree with the military arresting the eight citizens,” the statement said, based on an earlier count of those detained.

Cut from NEWS

The protest has ended because protesters have been captured by police. It was absurd because protesters were just standing there but they were still caught. Fortunately,  they have been released later.

I’ve updated this blog because it’s too much to handle now.

I want to write down below message on my Facebook but I cannot do it. I don’t know I will be ok or not even I post it here. But I need to.

this is not normal; this is called injustice; and it’s too much to ignore; and some Thai people are blind with their bias if they can’t even see it; this is abnormal; i don’t know how can i tolerate in this situation; act normally despite the fact that this is absolutely shit; shit happens and i am the one who is living in it; unable to shout; to speak; or even whisper; in order to survive; that’s how they threaten us with fear; they seem to be successful; aren’t they?

The Silent NEWS

Something not right happened here in my country where people against Thai Military Junta could be abducted from their normal life according to this news Student Activist Leader ‘Abducted’ from University. I don’t say that I agree with their activity. But it’s not right to be abducted like that neither. This is not normal. This isn’t the thing you should accept without saying anything. Thus, not my peers have said anything or even for me.


Quote by Liu Xiaobo

I cannot express my worrisome over this military act via my social network or around me since I’m not sure about the reaction. And this happens to me for a long time since my country has been ruled by Thai Junta. I’m living in fears. I know in my heart that it’s not safety to say or act against them. You can say that Freedom of speech hasn’t been heard here quite a while. I believe that some people think they can say whatever they want but no! they just can act or say things the government approved them to speak. They may have protested for something they care except this injustice or low human rights here.

And I don’t know what is the way out from this situation. My passionate for justice and democracy is dying down. The best method for me to breath and act normally is to pretend that I don’t care. Just living as everything here is fine. Happiness is around the country. Ignorance is a bliss. Screaming as silent as you can.

Sound of Silence

I’d like you to cherish your opportunity to speak your mind, to give opposite opinions, to nag about your government freely. Because if you loose your rights to speak, you will live like us here in Thailand.

12 days ago, military coup occurred again in Thailand. And the coup leader just stated that they will need 15 months to complete their road map before the next election. 15 months that we need to live in silence. The news journalists cannot report anything against the coup. It is sad that my country goes to this state again. It is sadder that there are a number of Thai people who agree with this ancient act even though we are living in the modern world where we should ask for Democracy not military junta.

The anti-coup activities still happen sporadically despite the tight security. There are not many people going out there but military put a lot of effort to stop those who oppose this coup. They have captured some people who just showed paper asking for election.

This anti-coup is a symbol movement. They utilise various methods to display their opposition such as showing a piece of blank paper because the military has ordered Thai people to not speak, write or show any sign of opposition. A few protesters just sit/stand and read books such as 1984 by George Orwell. There is a man standing near BTS station displaying QR code. Some people raise 3 fingers in order to represent the sign in the Hunger games. Some of Thai people might think their acts are ridiculous but I think they are brave to do so. It’s not that easy to go and act like that when military still use the martial law control our country now.

Thank you to those who went outside and captured photos. Hope that the world will know what is happening here in Thailand, the land of smile.

The bloody sky

This photo was the sunset today here in Bangkok, Thailand on the 4th Day of Coup d’etat.

Bangkok | Thailand | 25 May 2014

Bangkok | Thailand | 25 May 2014

I don’t want to write this post in sad tone.

But everything around here is stressful for me since the coup was held on 22 May 2014.

If you ask some Thai people especially those who are middle-classed or elites, you may get the full support for the coup from them.

However, not everyone thinks like that. There are Thai citizens who are opposing to this coup and they go outside to show their opposition.

Right now, it may not be that many. I don’t think the military band will be annoyed by them.

Still, I just read the news that the National Council for Peace and Order (NCPO) said that they might use the law and power to seize this outcry. NCPO is the name of military group who is now taking control our country.

It reminds me of the time when Thai people was killed by military weapons in the past. And those soldiers or commanders have never been punished.

I’m afraid that this might happen again.

And the sadder thing is that some Thai people cheers for this act of controlling.

It’s too hard for me to comprehend how some people can be such ignorant in this kind of situation.

I don’t know how are we going to survive this terrible cycle again.

How am I suppose to do?

Maybe I need to be ignorant like those peers around me.

But how am I going to do that without breaking my belief since I was younger.


25 DAYS | 25 SONGS – DAY 03: My Parents


My parents always teach me to believe in human rights, equality, and democracy especially my father. So when the military has seized the power from the election government in Thailand since 22 May 2014, it reminds me of the time when I was in high school. In May 1992, there was a bloody military crackdown in Bangkok. My father first wanted to go out to join the protest. However, my mom didn’t allow him to go. They had a huge argument, and my dad needed to follow my mom’s request.

Our family always believe that the rights to vote should go to all Thai citizens. It is against our common sense to support the coup d’etat now in Thailand. I’m glad that my parents have taught me to believe in something like that even though this notion makes me dissimilar from my peers who are middle-classed Thai citizen since some of them support this coup. My parents’ teaching have shaped me to be a person whose belief isn’t swayed by peer pressure in this situation.

Found this challenge on fishofgold.

Occupy your mind

On the 22nd May 2014, there was a coup d’etat in my small country. They have issued many announcement so far which mainly focus on forbidding everyone says their opinion against this coup. They prevent some journalists to report news. It is the 13th Coup in Thailand which I never ever feel good with this kind of act. However, how can I do anything to this situation as I am only a civilian in this tiny country where the world doesn’t have to care for us. Moreover, there are a number of people especially elites and middle-class bangkokians who agree with this act. I never understand their logics. How can people say no to the real democracy and say yes to the military act?!?  They can firmly hold to the notion of military against corruption of the elected government. Still, we can speak our mind to the elected government if they have done something fishy which we have proved to that before. BUT we can’t be sure whether we can speak anything to the people who rule us now with weapons and power.

‘Cause it’s the funniest feeling 
So let’s slip inside 
Out of this world 
Out of this life 
‘Cause this place called home 
Is no longer mine 
So now I need to occupy your mind 

I just want to occupy your mind 
(‘Cause it’s the funniest feeling) 
I just want to occupy your mind 
(So let’s slip inside) 
I just want to occupy your mind 
(Oh, it’s the funniest feeling) 
I just want to occupy your mind 
(To leave it all behind) 

Well there’s a crack in the ceiling 
And there’s a hole in the sky 
And there’s a government warning 
They don’t like our kind 
But now it’s three in the morning 
And I’m feeling just fine 
And I just want to occupy your mind

– Occupy your mind by Villagers –

On the 2nd day of the 13th Coup d’etat in Thailand.



This photo was took at my grandma’s home when I visited her yesterday (22-Mar-2014). Those who never be here in Thailand might not know what this is. The small building acts like the house of spirit. Some Thai people believes that there are spirits who has been taking care of their homes so they need to pay respect by building a house for those spirits. My home doesn’t have this one but our grandma’s house has.

We called this in Thai word as ‘Sarn’ (Shrine) which is the same word as ‘Sarn’ (Court). Speaking of court, I stopped writing about Thailand’s political situation for a while as we could pass the National’s Election day without so much violence even though there were bombs in some area during the following weeks. I therefore didn’t thought I would bring this topic back to my writing on Sunday so soon. However, there was a news that decreased the peace of my mind immensely. The constitutional court of Thailand ruled that a general election in February 2014 was invalid which voting result as 6:3.

They claimed that some voting stations couldn’t open to vote resulting this invalid election. Nevertheless, those stations couldn’t let the voters in because they were in the area dominated by demonstrators who have been trying to sabotage this election. So I felt like the court’s decision did’t look for the fact that there were a vast number of voting stations that could succeed the election. There were about 20,000,000 Thai people who walked out of their home to the voting stations even though they felt fear for their safety as they might have encountered some violence from those who disagreed with this election.

I felt like I have been betrayed by their decision to rule out the election February. My voice has been violated by this. My rights to vote has been ignored all over again.

Only those who have been supporting the demonstration in Thailand are the one who have their voices to dictate how Thailand will go in the future. I, myself, as a Thai who always believe in doing the right thing, follow the laws, respect other people’s voices, and never insult others based on their educational background, be just a voiceless person who was born and no other choices but living in this country. I have been living in lies that this land is mine. Hell, no it isn’t. And that I will keep in mind to remind myself that I should stay low and let all high and mighty people do what they want to do with this country.

I hope I can do that.

Before blooming


I’m currently practising a manual mode (Mode M) on my new camera and I have fun doing it despite the fact that I need to snap many shots to get just one decent or acceptable image. Like this one that I photographed almost 30 photos and only one photo that I was satisfied with. But I know that this is a practice so we have to shoot a lot to reach the certain level that we can recall which set up we should use in various situations.

This bud of a rose is in a flowerpot next to our terrace in front of our home. I think it is a first one of roses to bloom after the winter season (which the winter in my country wasn’t that cold compared to other areas around the world).

While taking its photos, I realized that this rose will have a chance to bloom to a beautiful one. Nevertheless, a girl and a boy didn’t have opportunities to do that because their lives have taken away before passing the youth. Apart from that, there are other children who will never have any chance to grow up with their fathers or mothers because the death came to their families.

Why did I say that? The reason was that during the past week, there were 3 deaths in a clash between Thai police and the anti-goverment protesters. Last night (22-Feb-2014), there was a bomb and shooting near the demonstration stage in Trad province and caused 41 injures including the death of a 8 year old girl. This evening (23-Feb-2014) before writing this post, there was another bomb inside the protest area near the department store which caused 24 injures and 2 deaths; one of them was a 12 year old boy sister and brother whose ages were 6 and 5 years old.

Although I disagree with the protest because their request is to get less democracy. But I don’t want to see anyone dies. They are Thai people like me in spite of different political belief. I oppose violence towards everyone. However, we can’t know what’s going on now. Who has done this? And where will be the next target?

I never thought that the situation would come to this state where I’ve gradually started to fear for danger to my family and I as well as my friends or people I’ve known.

I understand that life has to go on but I want this post to remember that some lives never have a chance to go on.

The distorted reality

Photo 2-16-2557 BE, 20 06 44

I’ve tried creating Bokeh for this challenge, and I got this photo too which I think it might have not be a good bokeh in term of photography? However, I just love it as I think of it as the mixture of painting (background) and photograph (foreground). The background was distorted like you couldn’t know what it was used to be.

It was like my life regarding the political situation in my country right now. Nothing changes after the national election has passed. The protest is still going on. We still don’t have a government because we don’t have enough representatives in parliament due to disruption at polling stations in some areas: Bangkok and the southern of Thailand. The worse thing is that the election committee, who should set up another election to cover the missing ones, decides to set a new election date in April this year which some might say it is too late. I never see the election committee who doesn’t want to support the election system like this one before. The demonstration still asks for something that I don’t know anymore. It is surreal. I feel like the right system has been amiss. The situation is beyond my logic to understand.

I think I might need to ignore everything related to politics. I need to let it go before my life is sucked into the twisted reality. Sometimes the stress is too much.

But I know that ignorance doesn’t help us through this tough time. So I just want to … Rest. Gain strength. Take a deep breath. Before going back to the world where everyone just believe what they do are right. No one listens to others. Only believe in the reality they prefer.

The distorted reality.

The day

Today (2nd Feb 2014) is the day when Thailand has a national election. To be honest, I never thought that we could come to the election because there is a certain group of Thai people who has been trying to undermine the rights to vote of other Thai citizens.

Let me recap something. On 26th Jan 2014, there were an early election happening around the country. However, some polling stations couldn’t open and some voters couldn’t enter the stations because the anti-government protesters blocked the places. (News)

To add the heat, the gun battle occurred in Bangkok (our capital city) yesterday (1st Feb 2014) between two groups of different political belief. (News)

Apart from the critical tension, my family and I peacefully went to vote at the polling station in our neighbourhood this morning (2nd Feb 2014). After that, I came home and needed to work from home all day because I have a deadline to meet for my project at work. I didn’t follow any news about the election. But I knew that there are some disrupted polling stations, and people who wanted to vote couldn’t use their rights. (News)

I still keep saying that I don’t know how or when the political turmoil will end even though we’ve already had the national election. I’ve only known that I want to use my right to vote for the government. I don’t want any group to choose the government for us. But if the anti-protesters win this situation, the one person = one vote will be discontinued as they claimed that they would lead the new politics in Thailand. They proposed to erect the People’s council which they would choose good people to rule the government and let Thai citizens to vote for some members of the House of Representative.

Democracy isn’t the perfect government system but I believe that it could give the basic rights for human beings in the political aspect. Thailand has a long history for our cry-for-democracy. We have lost their lives along the line. And I will never forget.
Photo 2-2-2557 BE, 19 33 37

Black May 1992